It's a common misconception that polygamy means one man married to multiple wives. No, it is illegal.Under Section 494 of the Indian Penal Code, if a person marries a second time, without a divorce, while their spouse is alive, the marriage is considered bigamy, which is a punishable offense. You are a little older now, and you learned some harsh realities. The study investigated the causes of polygamy, outcomes, and women's coping strategies to deal with co-wives relationships. She tried her best to convince her husband not to get married to another woman but she was not succeeded. They are sister wives, which means they have a friendship as well. My first marriage--even though it lasted five years--did not. Exploring the mediation effects of anger rumination and willingness to forgive on the association between self-compassion and romantic jealousy. Go figure. The participants expressed the usage of different coping Strategies in polygamous marriage as religion, fate, compromise, and sisterly bond with co-wives. Bigamy occurs when one man illegally marries more than one woman. Mrs. Kamal also has a good relationship with her co-wife. She was a nurse and divorce. But it's a hoax that has hit at least four countries to date . She has been married for 40 years. Growing up my mother was abused by my father, Thembi says as she wipes away a tear. Mrs. Kamal helped to take care of her co-wife and her new born. King MT. That tends to bring with it even more debt and insecurities. Yet we have to shake off the stigma attached to being The Second Wife and say, with a smile, Yes indeed, Im his second wife. The policymakers and law enforcement agencies should pass laws for the welfare of polygamous women. Gabe and I interact regularly with our exes and their new spouses, former in-laws, and current in-laws. Over breakfast her husband told her something that would make any woman choke on her toast: he wanted to take a second wife. Thobejane TD, Flora T. An exploration of polygamous marriages: A worldview. The purpose of this study is to investigate married womens experiences in polygamous marriages and their ways of coping to accept this relationship. Their average marriage duration was 11 years and living in the same house or compound. A nurse brought me this far she took me into her arms and her home and decided she would be my mother. Ethnographic accounts of 69 polygynous systems and reported evidence that the majority of co-wives in a polygynous family prefer pragmatic co-operation with one another while maintaining a respectful distance however having a deep-seated feeling of angst that arises over competing for access to their mutual husband [21]. Second theme: outcomes of polygamy as jealousy, unhappiness, and loneliness due to injustice, by the spouse were explored as potential pitfalls of polygamy. 3. One of the misconceptions about being someone's second wife is that you'll have no choice but to have a low-key courthouse wedding with minimal fanfare, and that the ghosts of weddings past will linger. 2.Explain the nature of your relationships with co-wives. She told she was also present during the delivery. One of the disadvantages of being a second wife is that for some reason, people are far less accepting of a second wife. U.S. immigration law frowns on being married to more than one person at the same time, and prohibits both bigamists and polygamists from becoming naturalized citizens. Your spouse has lost their first wife either to divorce or death, both of which bring immense, albeit very different, pain and coping mechanisms. If that doesnt help, she can then approach his elders and explain exactly what it is thats happening and how shed like them to help. Invest in the future today. Method: Exploratory qualitative method was used. 5. She got a marriage proposal from a married man to be his second wife as his first wife had a medical condition due to which he had not been able to sleep with her for last 11 years. And a leading women's group is applauding . 2014; 5(27): 1058-1058. Prevalence of mental health problems in women in polygamous versus monogamous marriages: A systematic review and meta-analysis. But it was a happy marriage for her with 2 children (one boy and one girl). Outcomes of polygamous marriages were a second theme generated by evaluating the relationships of co-wives. Instituting change for women in a male-dominated society is a daunting task; however, it is essential. Lots of people are betraying their partners while pretending to be monogamous. At that time her 3rd husband supported her emotionally and financially. The study was conducted in 2017 with approval from the institution and polygamous women. Your wedding is your wedding and you can do whatever you want. He may be wounded and certain things may trigger an emotional response, such as . An in-depth interview technique was used with probing questions to get the perception from polygamous women about their life experiences, reasons behind polygamous marriage, and what strategies were used by co-wives to deal with such relationships. The study is not against polygamy but the need to improve the family structure of polygamous families is a major concern. Not many people like a second wife. What Is Marriage Coaching? Mrs. Mustafa though convinced her husband of second marriage but she said I was very much distressed and lonely after the 2nd marriage of my husband. However, it is possible that a person is confronted with circumstances whereby he is unable to uphold his righteousness and purity, whilst maintaining relations with a sole lady, who happens to undergo periods of menstruation, pregnancy, delivery, suckling, and other forms of ailments, etc. Conclusion: Polygamous women though claimed that polygamy has disadvantages but to them, divorce is not an option. But thats not how it works out for everyone. 2007; 21(1), 108-127. Illiteracy, being a wife of a husband with three and more other wives, current history of depression, intimate partner violence, and poor social support were significantly associated with suicidal . While in many cites it has been claimed that if a man is unable to maintain justice and equality to treat all the wives then the above verse is interpreted as in favour of monogamy [2]. His first marriage counted. Cecilia says her husband married a second wife purely for his own physical desires and greed. An interview guide was prepared before conducting interviews which were consisted of the following research questions based on literature. Method: Exploratory qualitative method was used. You know, its so sad because the new wives are also being treated horribly by my father but theyre too proud to talk to my mother because of the way they mistreated her.. First theme: reasons of polygamy as findings indicated that majority of females allowed their husbands for co-wives due to infertility or having only female children, husbands love marriage, and in-laws family pressure because they wanted to secure their marriage instead of divorce. The study was conducted in 2017 with approval from the institution and polygamous women. Following subthemes were included in these main theme categories. Its not a series of glittering evenings drinking martinis in smoky bars. Mrs. Ahmad being 2nd wife told that after second marriage "I and my co-wife did not get along; our children also did not get along, and there was constant bickering between us. She stated I prefer not to attend the same social function or activity with my rival (co-wife). One of the disadvantages of being a second wife is that for some reason, people are far less accepting of a second wife. Social Change. All interviews were audio-taped, transcribed verbatim, and were then analyzed by interpretive phenomenological analysis. ASEAN Journal of Psychiatry peer review process verified at publons. Stanford University Press. Why is it higher the second time around? I knew my family wouldnt approve of our marriage, but I was weak. In a home with more than one wife, what happens when problems arise? Because her first husband always cursed him by saying a childless woman. Three themes emerged from the study based on findings. As when co-wives share their domestic chores, and other responsibilities of the family they become less possessive with time about their partners. A Tajik court found him guilty of polygamy and of driving her to suicide, but spared him a jail sentence and ordered him to pay a $1,300 fine. Journal of Family Studies. But Professor Maphalala says although each family has its own way of doing things, its usually the husband who decides how the children should be disciplined. 15 Signs of a Histrionic Narcissist in a Relationship, How to Make an Anxious Avoidant Relationship Work: 15 Ways, 15 Signs of Narcissistic Parents-in-Law and How to Deal With Them, 15 Signs of a Clinically Covert Narcissist Husband, Why Do I Attract Narcissists: 10 Reasons & Ways to Stop It, Denial Stage of Grief: Signs and How to cope, 10 Ways to Deal With Your Husband Not Wanting You, 5 Ways to Fall Out of Love After Infidelity, Treading Carefully: Getting Back Together After Separation, 3 Ways Separation in Marriage Can Make a Relationship Stronger, 10 Things You Must Know Before Separating From Your Husband, 12 Steps to Rekindle a Marriage After Separation, How to Combat the 5 Glaring Effects of Anxiety After Infidelity, How to Have a Trial Separation in the Same House, Feeling No Emotional Connection With Your Husband, How to Get Back Together After Separation, 6 Ways to Tell if Someone is Lying About Cheating, 5 Signs That You Are Living in a Toxic Marriage, 7 Important Tips to Build Trust in a Relationship, 10 Effective Communication Skills for Healthy Marriages, 20 Signs of a Married Man in Love With Another Woman. You can cancel anytime and if you cancel within 14 days you won't be billed. Now she was not ready for 3rd. "I'm in a traditionalist polygamist relationship. Decisions made by two people in first families are often made or influenced by four or more adults in stepfamilies. She also never tried to snatch her husband from the previous co-wives as she said in her religion the Holy Book says A man can marry women of his choice two or three or four, but there must be justice and equality otherwise only one is enough". It can be challenging when you expect those normally happen times of the year to be a certain way, but then they arent so much. You feel the need to establish more control over the decisions of your partner. This prompted one Javed to petition the Supreme Court that since Muslim. 2008; 148(6): 745-764. In addition, the interpretive phenomenological analysis (IPA) was used to generate a wide range of perceptions and opinions that women carry out about their experiences in polygamous family structures. It's like when you are a kid, and you have had the same best friend since you were a baby; then, suddenly, in high school, you have a new best friend. Being a second wife and a stepmother is rather like learning to perfect a set of aerial maneuvers. Concept of one soulmate for everyone is flawed anyway. I didnt really get it, but my parents are big on communication in a weeks time I was on board. Thembi says she knows people often question polygamous marriages but shes adamant that sometimes the women gain a lot more than the men.

Rosanne Cash Tennessee Flat Top Box, Papa Louie Games Without Flash, Who Is Replacing Poppy Harlow On Cnn, Craigslist Milwaukee Single Family Homes For Rent, Articles D